Ok so here goes....Since moving here to Tampa roughly two years ago I struggled with what's my purpose ever since the decision to become a stay at home mom. Before moving I had been a full time working mom, a part time working mom and had also been in school to be a counselor. I was and still am pretty passionate about counseling but God, as He tends to do has shifted the focus a bit there. I prayed and a large bit of it was my letting go of pride and finding my identity in my career and seeking Him for my identity and everything else. I was thinking, did I go to school for all these years and did you put this desire in me just for me to change diapers all day?? It also was, in a large part, letting go of what I thought I wanted to do with the rest of my life career wise. I began to learn what an awesome calling and challenge motherhood is and while I may not impact thousands I am impacting two precious gifts who will also make their mark as they make an impact for the kingdom. And that is a high calling.As I surrendered more He placed a new dream in me which I have yet to fully embark upon as I'm now in the seeking phase as to how do I embark upon this new venture. I still love do to counseling just in a different way. In praying through what is my purpose God said what are you passionate about, where do you see a need, and use that to build up others. I'm passionate about my children and raising them up to have a heart for God, who stand up for their convictions and seek to fulfill His purpose for them, and in having to start from scratch and create a new "village" after our move I love and have been so encouraged in talking with other moms and encouraging and building each other up who want the same for their kids as we raise up the next generation. I enjoy encouraging new moms, and have learned and been thoroughly encouraged in talking with fellow moms right there in the struggle with me and those who are way past the phase I am in and learning from their stories and tips and just being there for each other on those difficult days filled with tantrums and disciplining ( or lack thereof ). It's like a Paul, Timothy, and Barnabus type of circle of encouragement . Jesus, my husband and my mom friends have been my rock on my difficult days of being a parent. Unlike having a 9-5 where you can clock in and out parenting is a 24/7 job, well calling that you put in overtime for and you have some days that are as perfect that you can get on this side of heaven and other days where you want to throw in the towel and those days the encouragement from the word, and my mommy village has kept me going. I have been participating in a moms group for the last couple years at our church called mothers of preschoolers. In continual purposeful prayer I felt God tugging at my heart to start sharing my story to help other moms and to foster a community where moms can openly share their struggles, triumphs, and helpful advice. I'm in no means an expert in parenting or anything being only 4 years in and have made mistakes ( we are retaking a parenting class right now that we took last year just to really get some godly discipline strategies down better because that's been a growing area for us ) and am still learning . From what I hear the really challenging part doesn't come until they're teenagers. Eeekk!!!! So my next question then became so how do I do that? How do I share my story and create this community of support? Well In our highly technological society of today, the idea to start blog has also been on my heart. I've been semi doing it over Facebook but now I also felt a calling to do an actual one where I can go deeper and share stuff that I wouldn't necessarily share over social media like my struggle with correct godly discipline of the kids, and even going through a mild form of post partum depression ( the baby blues) that I had after having my oldest, Drew (who is now 4) , which is something many moms struggle with but don't talk about much. I don't know how to even start a blog and for awhile I didn't think I had anything to say that hadn't already been said but I was encouraged at a Beth Moore conference last month where she talked about embracing your place in the Gospel story and opening up and sharing your story because we all have a unique story to tell.
So If you're looking for picture perfect Pinterest projects and tips and strategies for perfectly well behaved kids and a well kept home then you've come to the wrong place with this blog because I'm just not that mom. Even if you are the "perfect mom" with a well kept home and dinner on the table at 5 every day with kids who never misbehave then you can let your hair down and release being "perfect" for a little while here. For my fellow mommas trying to hold it together on those challenging days or if you're in a challenging season with child rearing, you can come here for encouragement, a good laugh, a cry and some empathy from us who have been there and are there in the trenches with you in the real life day to day struggles that come with parenting and on those days when the kids are driving you crazy. There is a brokenness that comes along with realizing that I as a parent am a sinner and I have passed that down to my offspring as my parents have passed it down to me and the generation before that passed it down as well. The hope however is that God is there. He's there in the challenging moments. He's there in the good moments. He's there to help us and welcome us with open arms and give us rest in that He loves us as we are, even in those hard and messy and challenging moments. He also loves our children and will help us to be the parents He has called us to be. So welcome my friend, welcome to the beautiful mess of mommy hood.